Relapse

When it comes to suicidal ideation relapses happen often.  This is not your fault, but it does require more intensive treatment.  I recently had a relapse, and ended up an inpatient again.

For me the 2014 suicide attempt left me so broken when I awoke that I had a new found fear of loss.  Now anytime I experience loss I have a panic attack, and severe panic attacks can lead to an attempt.  My new philosophy is to take care of myself in between panic attacks, so that my panic attacks don’t reach the limit of suicide attempts.

I recently started bible journaling, and trying to learn new self care activities. This increases my self love, and overall sense of safety so that I can lower my stress.  I found that with lowering stress I don’t think of suicide as an option.  Relapse can be common, but it doesn’t have be. I have found if you are taking care of yourself between times of great stress, you lower the chances of the relapse.

If you do find yourself with elevated stress, first let your doctor know.  Then try other activities for self care.  I recommend new hobbies to prevent relapse.  Some find gardening relaxing, and some find cooking relaxing.  I find both helpful.  Some people spend time in nature, or other things.  Whatever you need to do to prevent that relapse in a healthy way I recommend doing more of it in times of high stress.

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